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Cherish Your Spouse

‘ …He who loves his own wife loves himself; for no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ also does the church… ‘
— Ephesians 5:28-29 NASB

You can pay hundreds of thousands in cash for a watch that will never disappoint you. It will tell time with mathematical precision. If you look at it fifteen times a day, it will serve you each time — and never get tired doing so.

And it will never complain if you look at it a sixteenth time.

It won’t ask you for a birthday or anniversary present; it won’t make any demands on you. It will just tell you what you need to know, look attractive on your wrist, and exist solely to meet your specific needs.

But who wants to be married to a watch?

More people than you might think.

Husbands and wives often treat each other according to whatever roles they expect from each other.

“Just do what you’re supposed to do and try to look reasonably attractive while you’re doing it, and everything will be fine.”

The problem with this kind of thinking is that husbands and wives are souls who want to be married to someone who will cherish the whole person, not just a particular role a person may fulfill.

Because life is so busy and there are so many demands on us, we have to intentionally build a cherishing mindset or risk valuing our spouses not for who they are but for what they do.

Someone valued only for what they do feels like an employee, not a cherished spouse.

We selfish, immature people have to think about how to cherish.

We have to cultivate thankfulness and gratitude over bitterness and accusation. We have to be intentional rather than distracted.

Not just on birthdays or anniversaries but every morning, all day, all night long and all times. We have to remind ourselves to think about our spouses with delight.


Dear Holy Spirit, help me to be like Christ indeed. Help me to love my own wife (husband) like myself and much more. Help me to cultivate thankfulness and gratitude over bitterness and accusation. May my home be one where a loving relationship is nourished and cherished. In Jesus Name. Amen.